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| my new tBLOG |
| 06.05.04 (9:10 pm) [edit] |
Hey ppl checkin out my blog :D what's up? Well uh...obviously i haven't blogged in awhile..and guess I'll explain...No.I'm not dead...or on some major drugs... I just made a new blog.....I got tired of ppl (everyday acquaintances..the ppl that pretend to like me) checkin out what goes through my mind so that they can tell everyone else :? make sense?Well uh...no offense to anyone..this is not directed toward anyone in general...i just don't feel comfortable with being so personal with ppl i barely know....even ppl i know and disslike....though i have absolutely no problems with random ppl viewing my feelings and uh..random crap...so if you're interested in my new blog..feel free to send me a msg and i will give ya the new name :wink: later...
*Ronica*
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| ~*I'm scurred*~ |
| 04.27.04 (2:49 pm) [edit] |
Sup..I'm watching [i]Texas Chainsaw Massacre [/i](for the first time) right now..and i'm soooo scurred :shock: [b]AAAAH [/b]:!: I tried watching it last Sat night with my friend,but I was like [i]"OMG!" [/i]and I had to drive home by myself...in the country...in the dark :shock: So, I just left (after bout 15 min of it)cause I was Fuh-reak-eeng-out!It was mainly that part with the Opossum that scared me so bad...man oh man,i friggin hate opossums!!!So uh yeah...lets see...what's new with me?Um,I have some [b]B*A*D[/b] allergies and I'm still sad :( Plus,I was gonna see Soil and Mushroomhead 2nite but I don't wanna n.e more...none of my friends wanna go. (the only friend of mine that is, will get in trouble by his girlfriend if he talks to me, which I don't understand) :roll:
[LINE]
Aw well..all is [i]well[/i]...kinda....well guess I'm gonna return to watching the movie ::shiver:: I need somebody to hide behind :P
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| ~*Swallowing my tears,painting on my smile*~ |
| 04.20.04 (7:54 pm) [edit] |
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~*Erm...it's 9:34pm.....and well I've just been sitting around thinking.....thinking about well..nothing in particular...and everything in particular..Make sense?Didn't figure so.But I don't give a hoot right now..just nod your head along :roll: and well I won't lash out for the time being.Here goes...read if you want, if not; well then don't fucking read it.... When I compare my life to the way it was last year...or just 8 months ago...CHRIST!Things aren't even close to the same...and won't ever be...at one time I had 2wonderful bestfriends, now it seems as though I've chased both away..like I do with everyone.So obviously....I just hate things the way they are :cry: I'm really sad...I can't imagine a time that I have ever hated myself so much...or that I dreaded waking up in the morning..or when I've gone to bed at night with the thought hidden in the dark shadows of my mind saying"Hmm.. maybe you won't wake up 2morrow..nobody will notice" :? It makes me somewhat relieved to consider such a possibility,which honestly scares the hell out of me.I don't want to hate myself, I don't want to hate other ppl, I don't want to be sad, I don't want to become even sadder when I realize that I'm a fucking coward,I don't want to hate life.But I've grown to hate mortality..in general... :cry: And,yeah very recently I was on a line--I didnt know how to end these things,and only had one choice,it seemed like. So yeah-I have even considered helping myself making these things true...not wakng up to a new day.but I don't feel like I owe it to anyone to explain.Anything. Every once in awhile, I might let it show....just how much I hate being here...being anywhere...just being. I'm becoming SO freakin hateful..it's overwhelming .....well....back to swallowing my tears and well, painting on a smile :roll: back to pretending to be "me" --Ronica Wheeeler, wish me luck :( *~
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| ~*Tantric,ShineDown&SilverTide*~ |
| 04.08.04 (7:31 am) [edit] |
*~Hello! =) Mornin all..it's really 8:30(am) here despite what time Tblog says..I know i know...i f'ed it all up... So anyways...I bought this concert ticket for one of my "friends" amanda...for her b-day b/c that's what she wanted so she could go w/me.And the other night her DRUNK b/f jake ""stole"" the ticket from her house and lost it:evil: And well, she just decided to tell me right b4 i left for the concert last night..so i had my trusty friend fender go! (luckily they were selling @the door) Have I mentioned that I went to a kick ass concert;?Tantric,Shinedow n,and Silvertide were there!! I got a cool Tantric shirt :D My fav band outta all of 'em is probably...Shinedown.x. Well, not much happened there,my friends-Randy&Thomas (and Randy's friend from work,Nick)were very nice :wink: and let us in line with them.Hmm...that's pretty much all that happened...I talked to some weird ppl...and that "friend" of mine that I talked about didn't even tell me that HER BF lost the ticket yesterday, she told randy!I can't believe her!!!!! :roll:URG!!Well...l8R
Happy Good Friday...it's my one day of spring break :!:
~*~*~*~THE USELESS QUIZ~*~*~*~*~*~
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| ~*What Can I say*~ |
| 04.06.04 (8:05 pm) [edit] |
I'm sittin here..it's 10:00 (pm) Tuesday....and I'm just sooo stressed out..yeah...well ppl who pretend to be my friends talk about me.Or they don't.Or they do.I have no friggin clue!I just wish ppl could tell me the truth :cry: It really does hurt my feelings..so yeah...I'm not ever going to trust anyone else anymore...just my (only) buddy Fender :P she's mad-funky :!: Well...wanna read a poem that I wrote[i]?"Sure Ronica!" [/i]Okay,ok..since you insisted :roll: It's called "All that I can say"(hence the blog title...creative,ay..hehe)...
[u][b]"All that I can say"[/b][/u]
[b]Here is my apology, something didn't go right,
I think about it when I'm crying at night.
All has been done, I made a mistake,
You said you forgave, but it was fake.
What can I say, it has all been said?
What should I do, I don't know how to act,
You believe everything you hear, like it's a fact.
You're being a hypocrit, placing the blame,
What I did was wrong, but you did the same.
I'm tired of caring, I'm honestly sad,
No matter what I say, you're going to be mad.
But, what you did was somehow "justified"?
To many times...have I cried.
You'll never trust me, I can just tell,
So why do I put myself through all this Hell?
Go on, believe them, I'm a bad human being,
I gave it my all, got nothing in return,not a single thing.
We're both humans,you make mistakes just like I do,
Though, somehow I always find a way to forgive you.
When I forgive, why isn't it returned?
We have both made mistakes, and we have both learned.
I have done all I can do, I went out of my way,[/b]
I'm sorry,so sorry, but that's all I can say.
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.x.R.I.P Kurt.x.  |
| 04.05.04 (6:17 pm) [edit] |
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~*Hello all!! You know what happened on this day,10 years ago?Kurt Cobain "comitted suicide". :roll: Well...don't get me started about Courtney Love...so I'll just say that Kurt Cobain was and will always be wonderful.....anywho...yeah.....I have a hell of a life :shock: I um..went "cruising" a bit in my sis' car sat night and....some weird guys with very nice trucks tried getting me to show them my boobs :shock: i said "NO" and then one of them showed me "something" and I freaked out and drove off...FREAKY! So...no more cruising for me..besides the fact that it's pointless!My sister has a very nice car...2002 Mitsubishi Eclipse and sunday i drove it home from work.. and well...me and another car kinda hit each other :x so now I hafta buy her a new car door :cry: Makes me sooo sad..but @least I got out of a ticket for having expired tags since I started bawling when the po mentioned that.. :wink: Yeah...so I'm still sad about the car...and well...ppl @ skewl just stress me out.And...on another note...I am not pregnant...that is impossible..and that is all that I'm saying about that rumor :twisted:Ha...I'm supposedly been pregnant for...what?4 years now?! :P L8r ..
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| ~*Sparky*~ |
| 03.31.04 (8:53 pm) [edit] |
~*Hey..it's 10:45 (pm) and i'm tired...but I thought that I would just blog to...well..talk about the big news!!!I got a dog. :) A very ugly one...but like garton always says..the pretty ones are always the dumb ones...like my Turtle (Myrtle)...well.I'll just say that his ugliness gives him more "cultural specialties" har har... AnyHOW...his name is sparky..and well, he is some kinda terrier...the kind that kinda sorta looks like a bulldog...![]() =http://img35.photobucket.com/...<---Sparky>
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| ~*I'm Through*~ |
| 03.27.04 (8:25 pm) [edit] |
[i][b]Here goes..tell me whatcha think..it's bout well..hopefully you will catch on :!: [/b][/i]I wrote this about 10 minutes ago...
[u]~*I'm through[/u]
[b]Every tear you shed,
Every time you felt dead.
You came to me, knowing I cared,
I told you what I thought, even though I was scared.
You asked for my trust,
Now,thinking back,it was probably just out of lust.
You said I as always on your mind,
Little did I know you would see her,once again.."in love",so blind.:roll:
Was I played, was this some big scheme?
Anything at all to boost your self-esteem.
All I wanted was to be your friend,
Then why do I want this all to end?
What has become of me?
Swallowed whole by apathy.
Just leave me alone next time your freaking out,
Don't ask for my trust when you're overcome by doubt.
Because you're being a coward, hiding from fear,
Forget what I said, that I would always be here.
I'm scared, I'm hurt, I'm tired, I'm through,
What you told me, was any of it true?:?
So, next time you wonder what's going through my head,
Think about it all, everything that was said.
I want nothing more than for you to be happy every morning you wake,
Even though I know your smile is fake.
I hope that one day your smile will be real,
Until then, I hope you can continue lying about how you feel.
Just know I listened, I cared, and now I'm done,
Why isn't she there for you if she's "THE ONE"?[/b]
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| 03.26.04 (7:05 pm) [edit] |
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~*That is a pic of my good ol buddyfender and me..(i'm the one ..not smiling :D *~She's my bestest most favoritest person every..pretty much,the only person i trust :wink:
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| ~*Me*~ |
| 03.24.04 (9:10 pm) [edit] |
[i]~*Today I was reading Thomas' old blog (blog drive) and I got to this part and by the end of it, I wasn't only sad for him..I felt like I wrote it!....so here is a close look into that complex..mind that everyone wonders about...comments?this is how i think and feel*~[/i]
[b]I start thinking about myself and all the things that are wrong with me. I even go so far as to think of all of the things that I could do to change myself, if I had the means to do so. For example: My teeth. I hate my teeth. They are terrible. I want to get them corrected. I want to get my hair fixed up by a professional. I want to get laser eye surgery someday. I want to be thin. I want… I want a lot of things. The only trouble is that I keep feeling as if I don’t really even want any of these things at all. If I don’t want them, why do I think I want them? …I always joke around and say stuff that makes me sound wrapped up in myself, self-centered. The irony is that I’m not really that self-centered, but I almost want to be one someday…or at least have a reason to be, to have something to be proud of. Maybe then…never mind. What I was going to say would be impossible. Forget it. So if you understood my meaning from this entry so far, you understand that the reason that I enjoy school and talking to my friends (apart from obvious reasons) is because they are the only things that keep me safe from myself…[/b]
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| ~*Lala**frickety**La*~ |
| 03.24.04 (5:54 pm) [edit] |
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:P Here's RONNNNNICA!Woot Woot!Yep..it's 7:45 (pm) (Wed night) and I just downed a big mug of coffee =)~ Which, yes..i'm not much of a coffee person..but I hafta stay up so I can type a buncha letters... :roll: ::sigh:: I'm such of a friggin loser..hehe..Well 2morrow I'm goin to a business contes (woot woot) and I'm gonna hafta sit there (45min)and type as many random types of "business letters" that I can..and I have no idea what the hell the formats for the letters are--I'm gonna blow it but oh well :-" ::whistles casually::then the rest of the day I get to sit around..urg...fun :wink: Harhar.Well..guess I better get back to my um..what was I doin?!L8R
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| ~*Turkey Days*~ |
| 03.19.04 (7:57 am) [edit] |
:roll: Sittin here in math...yay!Well hmm...lets see what do i have to talk about..oh yeah that's right.Absolutely nothin. :? Uh...well i learned how to drive my car (standard) yippi! And I hit a turkey the other day, actually I BUMPED it..naw it ran into ME! :shock: I Was confuzzled ::gasp:: Anyhow... I got outta my car to see what was goin on and the turkey was making a freak-crazy noise running back&forth in circles then looked at me :shock: and ran off! YOWZA! So uh..yeah..then i looked around and there was no blood anywhere...just a CRAP LOAD of feathers EvErYwHeRe!Omigosh Omigosh! :lol: Kinda funny,yet sad.Mmm..and I've learned what road rage was...I was caught behind the school bus ALL THE WAY to school this morning :evil: damn..well guess I'll blog on some other time when i possibly have sumthin interesting to say...
Hasta Lavista :wink: ![]() =http://img35.photobucket.com/... grrr
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| *~Woot Woot~* |
| 03.16.04 (7:31 am) [edit] |
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[b] :lol: Guess who drove her car to school today..... (a standard..yee-aww)!!![u]MEMEMEME!!! [/u]Yes..I'm very amazed that I made it since I just learned last night..right now i'm sittin here in math... ::yawn:: :roll: Well, 2nite i'm goin to an AFI concert!! :(i hope it's not cancelled :o ) Well..tata[/b]
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| ~*!!!ffo em ssip elpoeP*~ |
| 03.11.04 (5:36 pm) [edit] |
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:roll: eno gnisserped a...meop a etirw annog m'i kniht i..llew!GRRRRRU!dnatsrednu t'nseod ehs yhw ees t'nod i dna...tihsllub tsuj s'ti.ylterces.em htiw tuo gnah ot stnaw ehs tub...pu kcuf eht tuhs ot mih llet t'now ehs taht ffo em sessip gnikcuf ti yhw ees t'nseod ehs dna...em htiw tuo gnah ro klat ot ton reh dlot eh os.hguoc.kcirp a s'eh.hguoc...em ekil t'nseod ohw fb siht sah "sdneirf" ym fo enO...dab OOOOS ffo em dessip tsuj taht deneppah yadot nihtmus tuB!haey lleH!tset gnivird ym dessap I...niaga ecno...ma I ereh !olleH :twisted:
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| 03.10.04 (8:51 pm) [edit] |
![]() =http://img35.photobucket.com/...
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| ~*WHY RELATIONSHIPS&PARALLEL PARKING SUCK*~ |
| 03.10.04 (8:11 pm) [edit] |
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~*So..here I am...Wed night...it's 10:00 (pm) here...and I'm sittin here- just got home awhile ago from practicing [b][u]parallel parking!! [/u] [/b] :shock: So SO Tramatic...I'm (most likely) taking my driving test 2morrow (thurs) WISH ME LUCK*~Anywho--I will unless I freak out and decide I'm not ready (prob will) hehe.. But uh yeah..yesterday on the Family Guy (hahaha..I heart .x. that show)) they said [b][u]"why don't ya make like siamese twins and split in half..and erm..one of ya die"[/u][/b] ha! :lol: Reminds me of some relationships I know of! Yes I respect people's decisions...but I am just trying to make the point of why I'm "anti-relationship" at this moment clear! :roll: I'm 16..I just don't need a relationship right now it's just a waste of time and effort.. I really don't feel like playing husband and wife... or like living out a soap opera ..for everyone else's entertainment.. well..i'm out... L8a BloggaG8as HAHAHA :lol: LMAO that was very stupid..imagine that :P
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| ~*I GIVE UP*~ |
| 03.04.04 (8:23 pm) [edit] |
:? It's almost my 16th birthday (today is 3/4)...2 more days!!WOOH!! But, I'm really sad... :( once again! I think that I finally figured out why I'm so sad :idea: I just never know who I can TRUST.Why can i TRUST anyone..and why do I always make the mistake of TRUSTing ppl?Seriously..it makes no sense what so ever..so many ppl tell me different things...I just want real friends..not ppl who pretend to be my friends..or ppl who are my friends when they're benefiting from it...I'm just tired.Tired of it all.Tired of the Bull shit.Tired of the lies.Tired of ppl interfering.Tired of ppl talking about me RIGHT BESIDE ME.Tired of ppl thinking that I don't notice.Tired of my even being. :? For awhile I wished for nothing but for things to go back to the way they were..when really things were just as they are now..things just didn't phase me...I was just gullable..or maybe I had my head stuck up my @$$ and just didn't want to notice..Man..I really miss being apathetic..wish I didn't care about NOTHING.NO ONE. I'm out.. :cry:
.x.Here is a pic of me in my cowgurl attire :wink: -- just click on the http://server5.uploadit.org/f... .x.
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| ~*Lalala*~ |
| 02.28.04 (8:06 pm) [edit] |
Okay...it's 10:00 saturday night..and i'm home..yes i'm a wild one, i know! =P well here is a jigga muh thang i took from dumblondegirl's blog who took it from Raven's blog :wink: Here goes..
PAST.
-first grade teacher's name: Mrs.Bird
-last word you said: Blah
-last song you sang: Uh.... Every Rose Has Its Thorn..by:Poison (i heart it)
-last thing you laughed at: One of those stupid voices in my head telling me some crazy crap
-last time you cried: yesterday..when i turned my (silver) class ring gold =(
.PRESENT.
-what's in your cd player: Slipknot
-what color socks are you wearing: Rainbow striped
-what's under your bed: ::shudder:: The Boogie Man
-what time did you wake up today: 7:00 am
.FUTURE.
-what is your career going to be: Dental Hygentist...or a psychologist
-where are you going to live: in Mississippi after college..then prob back in the country in Missouri
-how many kids do you want: uh,...2 (?)
-what kind of car will you drive: A hummer =P yeah right...
.CURRENT.
-current hair: long..blondish-brown..usually curly..sometimes straight
-current clothes: right now i'm wearin' my highwater overalls..and a pink shirt
-current jewelry: class ring..and a pink ring
-current annoyance: I SMELL PEPPER RIGHT NOW.AND IT'S MAKING ME SNEEZE
-current smell: pepper...damnit..where is that coming from?! urg..
-current longing: to stop smelling that pepper
-current desktop picture: a picture of Wesley Scantlin =X I heart him
-current favorite music artist: dunno..
-current book: Lord Of The Flies
-current worry: If i'm gonna finish my science fair experiment.
-current hate: pepper
-story behind your username: SASSYRONICA..lets see..where to start...Uh..Hi I'm Ronica, not VEronica...I have been told many times that I am sassy
-current favorite article of clothing: my new black boots with really pointy hills
-one person you wish was here right now: Wesley Scantlin
-i feel lonely when: People make me sad =(
-favorite author(s): idk
-do you think too much: YEs, it's crazy tho...about stuff that isn't "important"
-if you could live anywhere in the world, where: um : the moon =)~ u said *anywhere*
-do you have any regrets: yes, so many
-favorite coffee: hot chocolate..coffee is blah
-favorite smell: cucumber melon
-what makes you mad: stupid ppl
-favorite way to waste time: i guess doin stuff like i am right now
-what is your best quality: i dunno...sometimes i wonder that..i have a DECENT personality...and my appearance is DECENT
-are in currently in love?: frick no
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| ~*"Cowboy Up"whahaha*~ |
| 02.27.04 (10:09 pm) [edit] |
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Yep..it's Friday...midnight exactly...hm...guess it's Saturday then! way to much thought ::head cramp:: Well...2nite I got all prettied up...straightened my hair (WooHoo) and went to the "Bull Blast" in springfield! :lol: Interesting...i kinda like rodeos..and have gone since I was really young since my parents are ::shudder:: Cattle Folk but I just don't like the smell of cow poop and the annoying cowboys with nice butts that spit tobacco and whistle as ya walk by :roll: Boys..ha...I even wore my cowgurl hat..very sassy..I think I made a sechzi Cowgurl :wink: woot woot ronica! J/K! hehe..that's about all that's been happening....I took a pic of me in my hat w/straight hair w/my digital camera..but i'm 2 damn tired &lazy right now to try to figure out how the hell to hook everything up right now..so i might post it 2morrow :wink: till then..l8r days.. hehe...PEACE :P
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| ~*School*~ |
| 02.23.04 (8:21 am) [edit] |
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Hey-loo! Right now I'm sittin here in geometry class @school...nothin new..ppl piss me off a whole lot :roll: Well,uh yeah...I'm in a decent mood....asi asi :) I'm not gonna be on the com for awhile b/c my p.o.s is @ Best Buy being repared and crap...I bought 2 new cd's this wknd..Incubus...and Mtv2 Headbangers Ball...good cd's... (megalowmaniac) :shock: Well...guess I'm gonna go...I'll blog on l8r..when i eventually get my computer back!! ***pEaCe :wink:
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| ~*Still SaD*~ |
| 02.18.04 (10:14 am) [edit] |
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Surprise..I'm still sad :cry: I'm sittin in Science...right now ::sigh::
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| ~*Tears Of Apathy*~ |
| 02.16.04 (10:24 am) [edit] |
~*It's Monday...noon:14 o'clock...and I'm sittin at home bored. Not much has been happening in my oh so glamorous life ::sarcasm:: :cry: I'm sAd...ppl make me really sad..I can't really explain why...so I'll just leave it simple...everyone makes me sad...and it really sucks..so I get even more sad just thinking about it... :cry: Yeah,my Valentines Day was just fine..I worked and erm,shopped...on Sunday I went out to eat for my mum's birthday @Cheddars (mmm) well, I wrote a poem the other day..don't think I like it..can't make up my mind...but here it is..I "named" it "Apathy"
~*Apathy*~
Here I cry,all alone,
Just this body,cold as stone.
As the blood drains from my head,
I can't help from smiling at the thought of being dead.
For way too long,I lived this nightmare,
So,go on ahead, act like you care.
You put me down every chance that you got,
But,forever I'm gone,just a mere thought.
I don't know how it is to love,or even feel,
Can you even prove that "love" is real?
I feel the warmth of my blood,I love the pain,
Do you know how it is,to be insane?
Finally,floating,I'm floating away,
Alone in the dark for eternity I'll stay. [image]sassyronica_818392 542.jpg[/image]here is the butt pic,again..thought it might "lighten my mood" Well, it didn't..surprise surprise :?
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| ~*Oh Beavis*~ |
| 02.06.04 (9:36 pm) [edit] |
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*~Another Friday night...and ::gasp:: I'm home :shock: It's 11:01 pm and I just got home awhile ago from the Conway homecoming (what fun) hehehe... 8) Anywho-- not 2 much happened...uh...WAIT.YEAH!I saw my "ex" bf JD :oops: and he talked to me a bit...and said he was gonna call me....interesting :? Yeah..right now I'm watching Beavis&Butthead ::lol:: and Beavis just revealed that he isn't a natural blonde! :lol: omigosh! Well...l8r
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